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selfish

Ever had the dream you couldn't wake up from? Or how about the dream you do wake up from but then go right back to?

That's what I did all night. No matter how hard I tried I couldn't shake myself out of this dream. I usually wouldn't mind as I mostly have grandiose dreams of being a pro snowboarder/skateboarder or I can fly or get away with crazy things that I couldn't get away with in reality...

But last night I dreamt that Nicole was pregnant. And it wasn't one of those dreams you know is a dream. I thought it was real and all night I struggled with coming to the reality that I was going to be a father. I had to realize that it was all going to be about the child now, not Nicole and I, and I became horribly depressed. Depressed that I haven't been able to do all the things I wanted to do before becoming a father. It made me realize how selfish I am and how truly unprepared for parenthood Nicole and I are.

Believe me, I want kids. Just not yet.

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This page contains a single entry from the blog posted on May 9, 2007 7:22 AM.

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